Drafting Guys over 60.

 Im over 60 and the Armed Forces say I'm too old   to track down terrorists. (You can't be older than 35 to join the military.) 
They've got the whole thing backwards. Instead of sending 18-year-olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35. 

For starters: 
Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. 

Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy. 

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. If we can't kill the enemy we'll complain them into submission. "My back hurts! I'm hungry! Where's the remote?" 

An 18-year-old hasn't had a legal beer yet and you shouldn't go to war until you're at least old enough to drink. The average old guy, on the other hand, has consumed 126,000 gallons of beer, and a jaunt through the desert heat with a beer and an M-60 would do wonders for the old beer belly. (Note there are 24 hours in a day and 24 bottles in a case...another convenient way to measure time!) 

An 18-year-old doesn't like to get up before 10 a.m. 
Old guys always get up early to pee. 
If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser. 

Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we like soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. 
We like them almost better than naps. 
They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training. I can hear the Drill Sgt now, "Get down and give me ... er ... one." 

Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet. 
An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to carry on a conversation, and to wear pants without the top of his butt crack showing and his shorts sticking out. He's hasn't figured out that a pierced tongue catches food particles, and that a 400-watt speaker in the back seat of a Honda can rupture an eardrum, and that a baseball cap has a brim to shade eyes, not the back of his head.

These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way. 

Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten cowards who attacked us on September 11. The last thing an enemy would want to see right now is a couple of million old farts with attitudes. 

Share this with your senior friends.   It's purposely in big type so you can read it.

America The Broken Hearted

Another post by the brilliant mind of Amber Best Roberts - I want all of my friends and family to read this. I think we should all strive to make the changes that she suggests:

It was hard to face my children at the breakfast table this morning. My heart breaks for them, and this country. There is a great a division in this nation.

There are an abundance of people who voted out of ignorance, who couldn't tell you a single policy they voted for by voting for President Obama. There are those who voted right down party lines; but, the people that truly break my heart, break my heart because of their core beliefs. Core beliefs that are contrary to not only how this country was established, but contrary to God.

As I looked in my children's faces this morning, I felt like this nation had failed them. My solace is that I know that God is my Ultimate Leader and only true peace comes through Jesus Christ. So, for those of you that are in my same mind set or you are broken hearted for your country, the attack on Christian values, your children, the millions of aborted, the debt, Israel, the military, answers to Fast & Furious, the terrorist attack in Libya, rising unemployment, rising taxes, the debt cliff, the hurt on small businesses, an estimated 200,000 defense job cuts in Virginia alone, the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy... to a name just a few. What do WE do?

Let's start in our home, with our families. What values are children learning from us? What do they see us do? What do they hear us say? We can't look to schools, whether public, private, or Christian to teach our children values. God isn't even in most of them, He simply is not allowed. The lessons need to start at home.

To parents, who do our children look up to today? Is it the rapper that stood next to our president and said the N word, Fu*#, "ho", and bitch repeatedly? How many women have been slapped around and called a bitch and "ho" ? How many of God's children were called the N word as they were beaten by slaves are forced to use the back door? President Obama said he had that song on his iPod, and so do his daughters. This is representation of America's first family, but I don't have to answer for his family and neither do you. I am accountable to God for mine. You are accountable to God for yours. Believe in Him or not, He believes in us, He loves us, and He holds us accountable for our actions.

What are our children watching on TV? Can they name all the cast of the Jersey Shore, but they couldn't tell you who refused to ride in the back of the bus? What do their web searches represent? Do our children want every new gadget, clothes, "stuff" yet they've never visited a shelter or seen poverty. Do we even know their hopes, their desires, and their dreams? Don't mistake me, I'm preaching to the choir. So, my plan for change:

As I finish up this post, I have decided to unplug for a while. I need to examine my own heart and family. What can I do to better serve God, family, and others? I want to read more to my daughters, then read what's new on Facebook? I want to have more dates with my husband then plan the perfect, mostly pretend getaway on Pinterest. I want to pray more to God then I talk on the phone. I want to do more for others, and show my children more of what giving looks like. I want to do less socially, so that I can do more for my church. I want to text less, email less, post less, and write letters to my daughters, like my Daddy did for me. There is nothing in my life that is free from re-examination.

My last post went a bit viral (for a simple girl like me). I had people contact me, that I didn't even know. I hope the THEME of this post go viral in hearts and homes, because that is when TRUE CHANGE will come.

On a final, funny note. My oldest daughter, Ivy patted me on the back this morning, and said, "you need some coffee." I told both of my girls it was important that we continue to pray for our president, President Obama. They both agreed, with the exception of 6 year old, Bella, who said, "well, if he (President) starts telling us we can't have puppies, I'm not going to pray for him anymore" The innocence of my children brightened my day. God bless you all. Christians, "be still" and know that He is God.

Amber Best Roberts

November 7, 2012

The morning after... you think I can get a free pill for that?